Gasbag Flameout

12/15/2020

Gasbag Flameout
how now orange cow . . .

There are a lot of reasons Donald John Trump slithered into the Oval Office forty-seven months ago. And a lot of reasons he’s headed for the door next month when Joseph Robinette Biden is sworn in. You didn’t know about the Robinette thing, did you? I’ll admit it doesn’t have the same mudslinging frisson as Hussein, but it’ll do.

         Anything’ll do, really. It is instructive to remember most MAGAs (You shall know them by their red-stained pates.) did not blink when told, “Remember, what you’re seeing… is not what’s happening.” That sort of phrase perfectly encapsulates Trump’s world view. Although no coherent view of the world is possible for a solipsist.  (Solipsism is like narcissism on acid. Not like hippie acid, like Alien blood acid.)

 Mr. Trump’s followers don’t tend to have (nor care to possess) a reasonable, objective, defensible view of reality; many believe the earth is less than ten thousand years old. Once you’ve swallowed something like that it’s not much of a leap to the notion that 50% of Guatemalan five-year-olds belong to a South American gang. A gang they had to commit first degree murder to join. As has been tirelessly pointed out by the fake news media (and even several earnest members of the organization) MS-13 started in Los Angeles.

And anyway, everyone knows it’s really the Salvadorans you want to watch out for.

         Trump will of course continue to operendi his modus; fleecing the faithful and avoiding the cross-bar motel. (A skill he taught to remarkably few of his lieutenants.) Defining those who voted for Trump as either idiots or deplorable is a mistake. What they actually are, is pissed. Perhaps a majority of them were born that way. That’s not going away when Trump carries Melania across the threshold at Cruella Castle in County Palm Beach.

         When the scarlet-tops get wound up – they’re worse than a bunch of ACLU pointy-heads railing on the death penalty. Greenpeace will keep you from cutting down a tree by putting a spike in its trunk. The Proud Girls will simply shoot you in the head.

         As Dick Nixon might have put it, “NOW, we’re getting somewhere!”

         Except that we’re not. The party might continue, but the guy with all the coke and whores has split, Jack. Ever since the premier episode of “Who Wants to be POTUS?!” when Trump and the soft-core First Lady descended from the skies on Big Otis, the MAGAS have sent the ratings through the roof.

But look guys, the Network didn’t pick up the series for a fifth season. What can I say? Write your Congressman.

But wait, what’s that slick new reality show on Facebook and YouTube? Something about 18,000 socialist poll workers toppling a government. The first episode was free but if you want to see the more please go to www.trump.com/one-born-every-minute.html/

Have a valid credit card ready. I’m told the new series will be renewed every season, as long as the MAGAs continue to finance the shooting costs and producer’s override.

Not that anyone cares, but those who’ve worked in a U.S. polling place knows ‘stolen’ votes are as common as virgin births. But these are the same idiots that believe in the safety of 5G and think chemtrails are made of condensed water.

         The lippy drunk at the end of the bar has finally gotten tossed out on his ass by an eighty million pound bouncer strapped with nuclear weapons. Will he get nabbed for P.I. as he stumbles out to the car, or maybe return with an AR to teach the bouncer a lesson he’ll never forget?

MAGAworld is certainly welcomed to keep buying tickets and staying tuned, but that big bouncer’s been working the door here for nearly 250 years and one’s kicked his ass yet.

If you don’t count Ho Chi Min.

Like any rapidly aging drunk with too much money, Trump’s next move is as unpredictable as it will be excruciating to witness. My best guess is that he’ll end up hawking stale launch codes and shooting scripts of the Zapruder film. That means either a long reservation at the Julian Assange suite in the Kremlin… or ending up as a door prize for some lucky MS-13 member at Leavenworth.

Whatever happens, there’s no way they’re ever letting him back into that bar.

One more thing …

Trump: ‘What You’re Seeing and What You’re Reading Is Not What’s Happening’

Click here to see the video

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